Solitude and Confinement

I just read a newspaper where a guy had to go to jail for match fixing...

What struck me was that I actually thought jail won't be too bad... I'd spend time reading, writing, workout, eat...as long as jail wasn't hard labour and only meant solitude, confinement to a routine and not being able to meet with anyone. ...it didn't sound difficult... I then realise why that solitude and confinement to a routine sounded vaguely familiar. It sounded like my life in Exeter! Now I don't think life in Exeter is bad...it is a wonderful environment but I realised that over the past few months, I have begun to miss my husband more and more and since I could not do anything about it, I buried myself into my work. Writing and reading everyday including weekends and evenings. Gone are the drives, leisure activities etc. Serene chides me for working nights, my husband tells me to get out of the house etc. But even if I did, it wasn't satisfying. The only satisfying thing was to obsess about the writing and reading and work. I am parted from my soulmate, confined to a routine, work day and night,... I built my jail in exeter! No wonder I don't find jail daunting. When I come back to Malaysia, my work is nicely paced...i have lunch with hubby, watch movie and have pedicure with lisa, do my work. No obsession there. But when I go back to Exeter, I bury myself in it and won't come out. It's the only way to bury the misery I guess....

I did think that since I don't mind jail, perhaps I can do something that will make me rich and then pay the penance of jail time (still keeping the dosh of course). Unfortunately, while I don't mind the jail and the stigma, I do have misgivings about sin and immoral behavior. Sigh....
this life is getting harder and harder..i come back to Malaysia with the misery of looking at the days go by before I go back to Exeter and when i'm in Exeter I live the misery....

Maybe it is time to have a sabbatical...